Saturday, May 22, 2010

The News

Yes we are still alive. Very much so--in fact.

I have been wanting to post for a few months now, but felt I should wait--due to my past history. So alas I have said nothing about anything.

Today I am eleven and a half weeks pregnant.
We had our first doctors appointment this week and that was the cue I was waiting for. I wanted the "go-ahead" from my doctor that I was ok, normal, and progressing like a normal pregnant woman should.
To be honest it has been a tough few months. After going through two miscarriages together, you can imagine how difficult it might be for us to believe it can really be happening. I have been in and out of the doctor's office since January getting tests and biopsies done, figuring out medications, and fighting with insurances. All in all, the day the positive test came, we were skeptical and mentally decided to have a "go-with-the-flow" attitude. After the positive blood test a week later, it was a little more real. We told a few people, but decided not to shout it out until after the first appointment with the doctor.
I have been sick, tired, and hungry. I haven't been sleeping, all smells are overwhelming, and the bathroom is a constant companion. I have only broken down crying a few times--which I feel is an accomplishment. All of this is expected and is "good." All these things gave me a little comfort that things might be normal--but it was still hard. I felt detached--and I know Danny did too. Having been through the pain of losing a pregnancy mentally turned me off to this one. Daily, I still have my doubts--is that cramp normal? i missed my prenatal pill again. will the right body parts start producing progesterone like the doctor said they would? can I stop taking the medication?
Seeing the doctor on Tuesday was the much needed boost we needed. I don't think I have ever had a more positive doctors appointment. He said I looked good, my weight was good, all my concerns about cramps and such after talking them through seemed normal. Still, it wasn't until we heard the rushing little "whoosh, whoosh, whoosh" of the baby's heart beating that it all seemed ok. Seeing Danny's face light up with unbelief and excitement at the first audible beat brought my tears. I cried for joy for the first time in a long time. There really is a healthy baby in there, and it is doing great. It is going to make it here alright.
Just thought all of you should know.

And, yes, when we know the gender--we will let everyone know.

10 comments:

Briana said...

Hooray Hooray again you guys! We are so excited for you!! Hearing the heartbeat is just magical - and I'm sure the doctor told you this, but hearing the heartbeat is (obviously) a really good sign and once you've heard it, they say your chance of miscarriage goes down to very, very low rates. So, hooray! I know what you mean about those cramps in the first trimester. They always freak me out. I have to go and read like five different sources that tell me they're normal before I feel better. :)

Hopefully you'll start feeling better soon! We pray for you and the little one every night. Love you guys!

F said...

:D

Megan said...

There is nothing like being a mother- both challenging but rewarding! You will be a wonderful mother and I am thankful that things are looking up for you! Keep that positive attitude my friend because you have a lot of "fun" ahead of you! No really you do- being pregnant has it's perks as well :) thinking of you often!

Rach said...

Congratulations! That is so exciting!

Christy said...

so, so happy for you guys. i'm glad you got the reassurance you needed at the doctor. it is SO exciting to hear that heartbeat for the first time. i remember that moment vividly- so many emotions! CANNOT WAIT to meet the little one. he/she will certainly be loved!

Erin said...

I'm still way happy for you and am relieved to hear that all is well. I hope that you and the toilet have a falling out soon!

P.S. I've only tried calling you 49 times in the last month because I miss you and owe you a package and a visit . . . call me, stat?

Jenny said...

I am so happy for you guys! You deserve it. Your baby is going to be adorable. We'll see you soon!

Amy said...

Last night as I was taking a shower I felt my large belly and was overcome with the thought that my baby is RIGHT there. I mean, you carry it with you always for 9.5 months but usually I forget the reality that my sweet new child is inches from my sight. I am so happy for you and Danny. Although pregnancy is difficult (I'm learning this more with this pregnancy than the others) it is such a blessing to feel that baby kick around in you, knowing it is perfectly satisfied hearing your voice and getting your warmth and nutrients. Hooray for motherhood! I hope you keep feeling better! Love you both!

LeslieK said...

I'm SO happy for you! It really is a roller coaster of emotions those first few weeks- for me it was the most I'd ever been frightened and happy and the same time.
I know what you mean about not feeling "into" the pregnancy. I had bad bad cramps for a little over a month straight (before I knew I was pregnant) and that was what clued me in that something was going on with my body, and why I decided to test.
The "whoosh whoosh" of my sweet Landon's heartbeat was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard (his first little cry when he was born is now #1...and his laugh =))
It gets better and better and better. Isn't it amazing to know that Heavenly Father knows who you are?
You'll be a great mommy, I can't wait to see some pics of your growing belly!!!

Me said...

DAH! So exciting!